"Win" for Prof. Ping Pong!

Check out Adams v. Kaplan, in which the Honorable Dr. Professor Ping Pong (of the University of Earth) suffers several defeats: The court refuses to use his "assumed name," and so calls him "Kaplan"; he forfeits his substantial evidence arguments; his brief suffers from "glaring" defects; he loses his unclean hands defense... But he wins on nominal damages! The court reduces the nominal damages award from $250 down to $1.